Strategies for Easing Family Tension: Guidance for Mothers and their Families
In the intricate dance of family life, the burden of managing tasks and responsibilities can often feel overwhelming. A recent study reveals that mental load, the cognitive and emotional stress of planning, organizing, and remembering tasks, can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental health.
Lowering expectations for oneself and others can be a helpful first step. It's okay not to perform certain tasks perfectly, and acknowledging this can ease the pressure on all family members.
Parents can take the first step towards reducing mental load by becoming aware of and expressing what is happening. Making tasks visible is also crucial, whether through the use of Post-its, shared calendars, or digital to-do lists.
The study found that half of all parents perceive the main responsibility for school-related issues as falling on mothers. However, it's essential to share responsibilities more equitably. Fathers can take on fixed task areas such as kindergarten communication, gift planning, and homework support.
More than half of the mothers surveyed (58%) adjust their work to meet the school requirements of their children. School-related matters are only a part of the tasks that need to be done in family life. A weekly planning meeting can help reorganize appointments and responsibilities.
The Ministry for Families of North Rhine-Westphalia recommends various measures to better distribute burdens in family life. These include improving childcare accessibility, support for caregivers in pension contributions, and fostering flexible and gradual child adaptation models. These initiatives aim to support parents and caregivers in balancing work and family responsibilities more equitably.
Self-care is not selfish; it's a crucial prerequisite for a healthy family life. Taking on a task responsibly means doing so without additional reminders or coaching. Letting go is important, trusting one's partner to handle tasks even if they're not done the same way.
The study also found that 85% of parents feel that parental stress affects their children. Mental load can make people physically and mentally ill, putting the body in a constant state of alert and increasing health risks such as concentration disorders, sleep problems, irritability, burnout, and depression.
Discussing feelings of overwhelm calmly with one's partner is important. For 53% of mothers, school-related issues are a daily thought. This constant worry can lead to psychological overload, conflicts with the partner, and stressed children.
In conclusion, reducing mental load and sharing responsibilities are key to maintaining a healthy and balanced family life. By recognising the importance of self-care, making tasks visible, and discussing feelings openly, families can navigate the challenges of modern life together.
